i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
