also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
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