i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Of course I have a pirate flag
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
