dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
babies were throwing up all over the place
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Randomize
