Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
You have to summon your inner elephant
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
