That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Randomize