Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize
