she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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