"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
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She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
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She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
the raccoons are back...
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