i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize