you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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