he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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