Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Randomize
