Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
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