the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
zippers are such a cool invention
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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