Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize
