was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
two words: eviction party
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
