pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Randomize
