I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Non-Jews are for practice
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
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