Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Randomize