I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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