4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
In other news, I just burned my penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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