He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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