The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
