This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
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