It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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