the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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