why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
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