I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
