I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
