theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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