she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
