I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
So squirting runs in the family.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize
