I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Success! We fucked roommates!
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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