What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
We left an ass print on the piano.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
You ruined the universe
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
