So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Randomize
