Don't you send me to vm
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
She needs sedatives and a leash
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Randomize
