i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Randomize
