We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Randomize
