even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
