So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
We had sex on a dog bed..
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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