If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Randomize