I wish life had little blips of pornography
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
