So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
