I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I FOUND THE LEGS
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
