Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Randomize
