I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
