Barsexuality is the new black.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
