Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
