Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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